Can I go outside?

I am determined to continue exercising. However, these past few weeks have presented my biggest external challenge so far. (For the internal challenges, read “It’s Just Jogging”)

First, it is cold here. You say, “Duh! It’s winter!” I realize that YOU might be confused since it has already snowed in Los Angeles, but technically, it is still fall.

Every morning, before I go outside, I check my high tech thermometer (an AccuWeather desktop widget) to see how cold it is outside. It has been pretty common to read that it is “28°, ‘Feels Like’ 17°”.

You know, 28° is really not that bad. In fact, I even enjoy it. It is bracing and invigorating! It’s the ‘Feels Like’ part that gets a little tough.

A few weeks ago, my widget said “17°, ‘Feels Like’ 14°”. I thought, “Well, I’ve run “28°, ‘Feels Like’ 17°”. How much colder can “17°, ‘Feels Like’ 14°” be?” So, I tucked my hands in the ends of the sleeves of my sweatshirt and took off running.

Between the physical effort required to run and my sweat outfit, my body stayed reasonably warm considering the circumstances. However, I don’t really have anything to cover my face. On that run, I remembered that I had forgotten what real cold felt like! My face hurt! My lips felt like they were changing into ice cubes while still attached to my face!

Now, add to the cold that fact that it snowed…and then it rained…and because it is so cold, everything turned to ice.

This week, self preservation forced me to abandon the great outdoors. I tried an elliptical machine for the first time. I just couldn’t get it right. I was either running in a continuously crouched position which made my gluteus maximus feel like it was going to explode or I would get jostled and nearly thrown off the machine when I tried a more upright, ‘natural’ running posture.

To top it off, the machine was constantly telling me to slow down! What do you mean, “Slow down? I’m supposed to be working out!” Let’s just say that I have not quite bonded with the elliptical machine yet.

Two days later, I tried a treadmill.  It is almost like running outdoors. Now, that worked pretty well.…

right up to the time that I decided to see what they were showing on the television and my left foot veered six inches to the left.

Now, when you are running in the great outdoors, generally speaking, this would not be a problem. However, when you are running on a treadmill, that six inches makes a world of difference because that is where the moving part of the treadmill ends!

My left foot hit the rail and stopped moving. My right foot landed in the desire target range and kept moving and I was unceremoniously thrown off the machine and sent sprawling (it wasn’t just a little shy of crashing) into the wall.

I am like a little kid. Winter already has me literally bouncing off of the walls and I am already looking mournfully out the window and asking, “Mom, when can I go outside and play?”

This entry was posted in Humor, Physical and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

One Response to Can I go outside?

  1. Patricia says:

    i remember my 6 months in chicago. i so do not like winters :(

Leave a Reply