Teaching and training young adults (i.e. adolescents) can be a treacherous undertaking. The smallest wrong word can set them into a tailspin.
Sometimes, it doesn’t even take a word…they just go into a tailspin and even they can’t tell you why.
Such is life in the wonderful world or raging hormones.
Although some would call me foolish, I dared to wade into the minefield last night. I sat down with my son and reviewed what happened at the tournament and looked for things that he could do differently the next time.
How do you do this without sounding like you are criticizing? I really don’t know but I gave it my best shot.
Why did I feel like I should do this?
He is probably going to be moving away to go to college in a few short months so I have to make the most of the time I have left with him. I thought this trip provided a great opportunity to help in the WAY he thinks and evaluates situations.
He was not nearly as excited as I but went along with me.
I was doing a pretty good job of bringing things to light and not pushing him off an emotional cliff.
Then I slipped…
I meant “You can control that next time.” I said, “That’s an excuse.”
His demeanor changed. When I asked why, he told me. I apologized.
I think that I connected with him. Why do I say that? At the end of my “speech” on deciding to not give in to the temptation to become a passive victim when we encounter suddenly changing or unfamiliar circumstances, he opened up his laptop to show me a poem he had written about striving hard to achieve unexpected success.
I gambled and won!
And I only slipped once.