What was I afraid of?

Before I left for work this morning, I asked my wife what time our son got home from his study session…

“1:00”

“1:00 A.M?”

“Um, hmm”

“On a school night?”

“Then, when he came home, he got on Facebook for a half hour!”

I woke him up at 6:00 A.M. to inform him that he was grounded for the next month and that we would talk about it tonight when I came home. I then headed off to work.

Now, if I just tell you that part of the story, I come out sounding like a tough, stern father, which I don’t mind. However, that would be quite a bit shy of the truth.

The whole afternoon, I was not looking forward to our conversation. While I was confident that I was doing the right thing, I had no idea how would respond.

It seems that this is a right of passage in our family. At about the same age, I had to ground each of his two older sisters for a month. One responded beautifully. One did not. I could see him going either direction. The thought of the latter response made my stomach churn.

Our culture tends to focus on the difficulties that young people face in their relationships. However, parents have their own difficulties to surmount.

What parent wants to discipline their child? We do it for their good, not for our pleasure. What parent wants to risk the pain of a breach in the relationship if their child rebels? None that I know. 

After inquiring about the previous evening’s events, I was reassured that it was innocent. However, it was still a violation of our family’s boundaries. 

As I laid out both the reasons for and the boundaries of his grounding, I was struck by his attitude. What was I concerned about? He was not only humble, he even seemed grateful! When I told him that he would have access to his cell phone for one half hour (for texting) and his computer for one half hour (for Facebook), he seemed surprised that I was giving him that much freedom.

All in all, it was a very rewarding experience. I can’t wait to see what happens in him over the next four weeks!