Ah, the challenges of being a father…
I really don’t know what this season of life is supposed to look like. My two oldest daughters have been on their own for the past few years. My son is attending college in Philadelphia and my youngest will graduate from high school in 6 months.
How involved am I “supposed” to be? If they don’t live in my house, does that mean that they are on their own? How far does the phrase “they are on their own” go? Does it mean that I am no longer to be involved in their lives?
I can’t really look to our culture for help…
I can’t really look back to my own past for help…
10 days after graduating from high school at the ripe old age of 17, I boarded my first airplane and moved from New Jersey to Los Angeles. I didn’t want any input from my parents. For four years, I did what I wanted!
I have lived with the consequences ever since…
Those four years damaged my soul, distorted my personality and twisted my sexuality.
Fortunately for me, there was a God in heaven who had mercy on me. I was dramatically and definitely converted at the age of 21.
The man who led me to Christ was my pastor for the next 20 years. He taught me how to be a Christian, how to be a man, how to be a husband and how to be a father. Unfortunately, he could only go so far…
There is a place where the teaching ends and the learning that only comes through practical application begins. Although he set a good example and taught me well, I had to learn to be a husband to MY wife. I had to learn to be a father to MY children.
I am still learning…
With each of my children, there are “issues” that are arising that need to be addressed. When I pray for them, I begin to see or sense things.
I have been through this enough to realize that when I see or sense things, THE Father is calling me to take off my “Dad” hat and put on my “Father” hat. I know from experience that putting on my “Father” hat will make both my children and I a little uncomfortable.
However, what else am I to do with the warnings, cautions or recommendations that arise in my heart for each of them? Who else is watching out for them? Who else cares for them? Who else is looking down the road for them? Who else knows them as well?
I feel like an old sea captain. Each of my children is just getting into their own ship. The whole ocean is before them! They are setting out to find their own buried treasure! I remember it well.
They know that there are huge rocks hidden beneath the water’s surface that can do great damage. I have told them before. However, they are sure they can make it through! If it were just them, the ocean and the rocks, I would be sure too.
However, the ever shifting and increasingly violent winds of culture suddenly stir up waves that threaten to dash their ships against those rocks before they know it.
I recognize the winds. I see the squalls developing. I know the way through those rocks. So, I have to climb to the deck and offer my young captains words that they initially might not want to hear.
There is a little apprehension. How will they react? Will they receive it?
Only God knows…
and He is not tellin’!
While I may not know how they will react or what the results will be, I do know that I will not be able to live with myself if I shrink bank. Cowardice is a disease that eats away at a man’s soul.
So, I climb up to the deck, pick up the phone and gently join my hand with theirs on the rudder of their ship and head straight into the storm. I trust that the Great Navigator will bring us through safely.
