Frequently as a father, I find that it is my role to be the bad guy. The latest example happened today…
My son has been working very diligently at his school these past two weeks. One of his classes is an AP Calculus with a very demanding teacher. He took a test this week that would determine if he could stay in the class and did very well!
Anyway, he only had a “little” homework that “had to be done” this weekend. However, I told him that I wanted him to get ahead. All day long, he avoided the work.
So, as a parent, do I say “You worked really hard this week. Take the weekend off”…or do I press him to actually get ahead?
I think that this is where we parents of teens make our big mistake. I mean, who wants to fight with their children? Who actually likes conflict? Who doesn’t want to feel loved and appreciated?
Too often, we choose to enjoy momentary relational harmony with our children rather than enduring the conflict of pressing what we know will benefit them in the long run. Today, I chose to push him to get ahead. And that did not make me to popular.
He is just looking at his distaste for doing school work that he doesn’t “have” to do. However, I am looking at the happiness that will result from doing well in his classes. I am looking at the fact that he was getting worn out with the late nights and the early mornings. He couldn’t wake up on Friday! With wrestling season coming up and starting a new job as a waiter, he has to get and stay ahead! For his health!
It is my responsibility to guide him, guard him and govern him. If he appreciates that in the process, great! If he doesn’t, I am still responsable.
So, tonight I forced the issue. As I said, I am not to popular with him right now. But, I think his perspective will change a few days from now
But for now, I am Dad, the bad guy!