I was listening to a radio show today and heard Marcus Lutrell, a Navy seal, say this:
“When you look in the mirror, bottom line is you are one of two people. You either call 911 or you are 911.”
I have never heard that view of life but it’s a good one.
I want to be 911. I live that way and I am always preparing.
Bean, our oldest daughter headed home for Dallas early this morning.
I know I have said this before but…
I felt a little sad.
It is back to being just me, my wife, Bunch, and my youngest daughter, Cakes.
As I analyzed my feelings, I realized that I don’t want to change anything.
She has her own life. She has her own friends. My wife and I worked hard to train her for this very season of life. I am REALLY happy for her.
I think that if she still lived with us, our relationship would be different. I think that we might grow tired of each other.
While I really enjoy my children’s company and conversation, I realize that they are where they should be.
Big A is supposed to be in Philadelphia. Kimba is thriving in Nashville. Soon, Cakes will join them and it will just be my wife and I, where it all began.
So, here I find a paradox. As a father, I am a happy, fulfilled. My children are successfully starting to make their own mark on the world.
And yet, in their launching and leaving, I feel a little sad.
I am glad that I feel that way.
I would rather know the pain of separation than to feel nothing at all.
My oldest daughter drove up from Dallas to visit us for thanksgiving last night. Even though I talk with her on the phone fairly often, I had forgotten one of her most endearing traits…
She is a blonde!
In the course of conversation, she mentioned that her car needs new tires.
“What size are your tires?”
“I don’t know.”
“Well, that would be helpful to know.”
She got slightly flustered and said, “Well, I can take a tape measure and go down and measure them.”
I started laughing…hard. The image of Bean downstairs measuring her tires with my tape measure was too precious! My wife is no mechanical genius but she laughed too!
Girls! What do they know? You’ve got to love them.
But, you’ve REALLY got to love them when they are blonde!
Sometimes I wonder how you read what I write…
I think many of you think that some of my posts are just the myopic boasts of a doting father.
For example, I have written about my youngest daughter’s singing ability. I told you of our trip to Denver for the American Idol auditions.
When I expressed my surprise and disappointment that she didn’t make it out of the first round, I am sure that some of you thought, “Right, your daughter is great. Then why didn’t she make it? Anybody can try out. The episodes that feature the lame auditions are hilarious.”
I don’t blame you. How can you know?
What I need is an impartial third party.
And they really need to be impartial…
Not someone who might endorse her as a favor to her old man…
No, we definitely can not have any nepotism here…
Someone who doesn’t particularly like me would be just about perfect, right? Then you might be forced to concede that I might just be telling the truth!
How about the high school? I have had several run ins with them!
I definitely ruffled some feathers when I took my daughter out of their English classes!
I know that I made some waves when I confronted two of my sons teachers and his wrestling coach!
I’m just guessing, but I think it would be safe to say that I am probably not their favorite parent.
They asked Cakes to sing a solo for the graduation ceremony!
I can’t believe that I actually had to defend myself to you! Amazing!
This year marked the first Thanksgiving that we didn’t have all of our family present.
Big A celebrated Thanksgiving with my family in New Jersey. My middle daughter, Kimba, couldn’t make it because of her new job at Starbucks so she celebrated it with members of her church family in Tennessee. Our oldest daughter, Bean, made the eight hour drive up from Dallas.
Oh well…I guess she must love her parents more…(just kidding!)
However, our table was not empty. We had three daughter’s from two other families visit us.
This marks the second year in a row that we have had a guest spend Thanksgiving with us!
Last year, one of the Kimba’s Tennessee friends drove with her all through the night to surprise us on Thanksgiving morning. She must have enjoyed herself because she came back for a second helping this year and brought one of Cake’s friends with her!
Well, there might have been another reason…
A few months ago, her younger sister moved to Kansas City to go to school. So, why not kill two birds with one stone.
My wife and I have known all three young women since the day they were born. We watched our children grow up with them so it was pretty much like having extended family around the table.
Big A wrestled at another open tournament this weekend…
and got his first college victory!
In fact, he got two!
He lost his first match by a score of 4-2. If he could have held his three point back move for a few more seconds, he would have won that one. But he lost his grip and the match literally slipped out of his hands.
He then won his first college match by a score of 9-2.
His won his third match in overtime by a score of 7-5. He was happy that he won but he really wanted to be writing an overdue paper for his English class.
In the fourth match, he injured his thumb badly enough that the match had to be stopped so they could tape it up. That coupled with the paper weighing on his mind made the fact that he got pinned a nearly pleasant outcome.
So, his record is now 2-4.
Hmmm…
That was his record after 6 varsity matches in high school!
As a writer, one of the frequent challenges I face as the author of this blog is what to write about. After all, my life is not all that different from everyone else. What makes mine special?
Nothing…
I have just chosen to write about it. And in the process of writing, I am forced to actually stop and look at my life.
I intended to write what follows last Monday, but forgot…
By nature, I tend to be a negative person. I think that I was made that way. Heck, even my blood is O negative! I usually see the problems that need to be solved, the difficulties that need to be overcome, etc.
I don’t think that is necessarily a problem…or even bad. The world needs people like me to bring some of the “Don’t Worry, Be Happy” people back down to earth!
However, if I am not careful, I can easily slip into the dangerous psychic malady of being ungrateful.Therefore, to combat this personality tendency, I usually start my day by going out for a “thanksgiving walk” where I purposely and specifically thank God.
When I stepped outside in the wee hours this morning, I saw raindrops hitting the puddles in the apartment parking lot. But, in the darkness, they looked small and it didn’t look there were very many of them. I decided to put my hood over my head and go find out.
What a surprise! It wasn’t rain…it was snow!
I went walking in the first snow of the year in Overland Park! Seeing the snow fall back lit by the street lights was beautiful!
Then I remembered…
I was also present for the first snowfall in the United States this year!
I don’t know what is significant about that…other than I was there! Twice!
Oh yeah, I thanked Him!
I wonder if these are signs…
I wonder if I am being sucked back into a black hole…
Just like yesterday afternoon, I have reason to be happy.
Our mechanic installed he transmission that I picked up in Wichita last weekend and the Nissan drives great! It ended up costing us $1,089 instead of the $2,500-$2,800 that the transmission shops quoted. That is really fantastic!
As my wife drove the Nissan home, I figured that I would head to the junkyard to look for a right front turn signal for the Paseo and a few parts to fix up our nice truck since I was somewhat in the neighborhood. While I was there, I thought I would also look for anything that I might need for my Thunderbird.
I ended up stepping into The Twilight Zone!
I parked on the street in front of the office because the parking lot was full and people were lined up waiting to get in.
I decided not to take any tools for my first trip. There is no reason to lug those around if they don’t have anything that I need.
I went through the entire yard…not one Paseo…not one Super Crew. But, they did have multiple sets of the increasingly difficult to find side view mirrors that I am using on my Thunderbird.
I walked all the way out to my car and got the tools that I thought I would need.
The mirrors were on cars that were near the back of the yard. Just as I got back there, the following message blared over the loudspeaker:
“The owner of the red car parked in front of the store, you need to move your car or you are going to be towed.”
I thought, “My car is red…I am parked in front of the store…But, I’m on the street…They can’t be talking about me…I better not take a chance.”
So, I hurriedly walked to the office. Just as I got to the counter, a red car parked directly in front of the front door moved. Just to make sure, I asked if that was the car they were talking about.
“Yes.”
I pointed to my car and said, “Then my red car is fine, right?”
“Well, the police will ticket you.”
“What?”
I went outside to check the parking signs. There were none for over 100 feet. But, if you walk far enough, you could find small, 8″ X 8″ No Parking signs.
I hopped into my car to try and joined the line. I finally found a spot and headed back in to get the mirrors.
I found the car with the nicest set, took the door panel off and started to remove the mirror when I realized that I needed another tool!
Back out to the car to get the tool…
Back into the yard…
I realize that what I about to write will make me question my sanity, but it’s the truth…
I could not find the car that I had just been working on! I looked and looked and looked! It’s like they came and took the car off the lot while I was gone! This sounds like me looking for the house yesterday!
I NEVER found the car!
Fine…
I’ll just get the mirrors of another car.
I started taking off the door panel…
and discovered that I needed two more tools!
I had already wasted an hour!
I concluded that this was just not meant to be, walked out, got into the car and stewed for the next 30 minutes!
I am not a happy camper right now.
I get off work at 3:30 on Friday’s. I really look forward to that because I have an extra time to get something done. It feels like I get an extra hour and a half of life on Friday…like setting the clocks back at the end of Daylight Savings Time except that it happens in the middle of the day when I can actually enjoy it!
Today’s hour and a half started out so promising!
On my way to work Monday morning, my front passenger turn signal light on my Paseo popped out of its place and was swinging and dangling on its wire as I drove down the freeway. I cannot imagine how THAT must have looked to the other drivers!
When I got to work, I asked the man who runs the auto body shop directly across the street from my place of employment how much it would cost to fix it. He did it for free!
Later that afternoon, I went over to shake his hand and thank him. I patiently waited while he gave an estimate to fix some minor damage on the rear this woman’s Escalade. His price was good…REALLY good!
A thought occurred to me, “Maybe he can help me with my project car!!!”
I went over today after work to see if he could give me a quote to do the bodywork and paint on my Thunderbird. He told me to take pictures of every section of my car and he would give me a quote on Monday morning.
I thought, “Why wait until tomorrow? I have an extra hour and a half!”
So, I drove over to the place where my Thunderbird is parked…
except the house was missing!
I spent over an hour looking for that house. It turns out that I had “remembered” the wrong street!!! When I finally found my car, it was too dark to take the pictures! And, this week’s hour and a half was gone!
RAZZA-FRAZZA!
I like my little car!
First, since the gas tank only holds 10 gallons, I can fill it up for about $20!
Second, that $20 will last nearly a week since I am getting 35 MPG!
Third, I had forgotten how much I enjoy shifting gears. I like having a manual transmission! I feel like I am driving again! It is making me want to finish my Thunderbird.
Fourth, it handles fairly well so it is a kick to take turns or drive cloverleaf on and off ramps!
Fifth, it has a really tight turning radius. I can make a u-turn in a bathtub!
It’s not all roses though. There are a few negatives…
You can’t drive a five speed and hold a cup of coffee in your hand.
There is no cup holder to put said cup of coffee in.
There is no cruise control. With all of the automatics, I would just set it and forget it. Now, I have to drive!
Did I tell you that I like my little Paseo?
